Happy Birthday Month to C & a C!!!

Believe it or not, you have all been fascinated by the life of Susan for one year now! Well, starting tomorrow, the month long celebration of Condoms & a Cosmo begins. With this re-birth comes a whole new look. I'm already missing the meloncholy charcoal black. I thought I'd start off a day early with some birthday/mid-year resolutions.

1. Change color of blog...black is depressing. And while your life is pretty damn depressing...at least your blog template doesn't have to be.

2. Stop thinking/writing about BDI. You don't like him remember?

3. Start writing about more things that matter instead of how sad you are everyone is getting engaged and you sleep with a cat every night.

4. Think positive thoughts like, Whooo...turquoise really is your color, Susan! and Of course he likes you back...I mean you did wait 48 hours to sleep with him. That's a long time!

5. Make new friends. If for no other reason than they will give you something more to blog about.

6. Get a roommate. Roommates ALWAYS make for excellent blogging. Example-Bitch used my deodorant again...You would think that dirty cunt would at least try and make it look like she wasn't rubbing my Degree on her hairy, pimply pits and put it back in the cabinet!

7. Get on board with some socio/politcal group. It's really fun to make people feel worse about themselves when you fill your blog with topics like how you saved the brothel born babies in Romania over your vacation time. Way better blog material than, Oh we spent a couple weeks in our timeshare in the Hamptons. It was smashing darling.

8. Scam more free dinners off old men at Sullivan's. Who knows...if you're lucky...one might croak on you and you can check his pockets for loose bills & change before the EMS gets there.

9. Save a little money to go on a real vacation with your girlfriends. That just sounds FABULOUS.

10. Allow yourself to love and be loved. Stop blocking people off at the first sign of irritation. Let people get to know you. Stop being so damn scared of intimacy or lack of intimacy. Just be...and be happy being. One day it will work. You will love and be loved. You will.