"Oh My God...You're the Blonde" the Tony Hawk/Jet Lee Reprise

Ok...this is EXACTLY what I get for thinking I am brave enough now to have strangers read my blog!

So, back in January, which btw I thought this was SO much longer ago, I was probably a little drunk and decided to profess my love to some guys hair. It's hot. I'm not backing down from that!!! Well, he had these friends...who are all adorable...and I'm not just saying that bc you crazies found my post about you guys that I thought was safely buried in archives! So, the friends show up at, where else, Pub Fiction. I almost immediately know them as Tony Hawk and Jet Lee. I'm not inebriated enough to talk to them; a little time passes.

This douche of an Irish guy comes up to me and starts mumbling something in a terribly thick accent. I just nodded...asked for a cigarette and pretended I had to go to the bathroom. Well, Stripper V and I come out & of course crazy Irish boy is waiting. He says, "I lit your cig, but you lit my fire"!!!!!!!! HA! Props to my man from the mother-land. That was the most ridiculous thing a guy has ever told me. Oh wait...no it isn't. The most ridiculous was in Abilene, TX. This old dude asked me to dance some country song with him. I mean old...65 minimum. So, I think...this sweet grandpa type wants to dance...isn't that cute. He tells me in one of those ignorant sounding Texas accents, "I saw you and your friend shakin' your hips over there, and I knew I had to ask you to dance." He draws me closer to his pearl snap shirt that he probably castrated cattle in earlier that day and proceeds. "I said to myself 'strap a saddle on that thing and I'd ride ya for eight seconds'." What the fuck?!?!?! I was 18 at the time!!! SICK!

Ok...so, I've had a few GnT's. And I'm asking Stripper V if I should go bump into Tony & Jet. Of course she says yes. So, I nestle myself in an open spot at the bar...Look at Jet and say, "I know you." He, in a quasi-condescending tone, replies, "yeah we were just here".

"No, I saw you guys here before. You were with the tall guy with the gray hair."
"Oh my God! You're the BLONDE!"
"Uhhhhh...OK."

Shortly thereafter, it comes out that my little post about Anderson Cooper, Tony Hawk & Jet Lee may or may not have circulated through some channels to ALL of the aforementioned people! Humiliation ensued.

"This is really not how I envisioned talking to you to go down."

I felt like Elizabeth Bennett when she's touring the grounds of Pemberly and Mr. Darcy walks up...unbeknownst to her. Humiliated. But I was drunk so it didn't really hit me till later.

Then they told me they thought I was snobby! Ouch. My mother is the only person that's ever called me a snob. So, that one kind of hurt. I'm sorry to anyone that I've ever told they should read more...I don't want to be that snob girl who reads. I have enough geeky titles and am not in want of another.

One thing leads to another, and I'm now on the phone with Anderson. I have no idea what I said...probably nothing.

We chat for a little while longer...and it finally hits me. These people aren't laughing with me...they're laughing at me. Ouch again. So, SV comes back...and we leave. Me feeling a little less confident...ok maybe a lot...and wishing Al Gore and his stupid internet invention never made it big! =)